The seating on the front patio consists of wooden benches and tables providing just enough space for a few groups willing to brave the Texas heat. At night, the neon from the bar’s sign pairs with red rope lighting keeping the stark color contrast alive in the evening. The first step inside is dive bar intense, the Asshole Section sign, the Christmas lights along the wall, the beer signs throughout the space, the surprising depth to the building, all of it combines to create a pretty perfect Texas dive bar vibe. That the beer coolers here are complemented by an extensive system of metal basins filled with ice and frigid Shiner only adds to the experience.
Hoity Toit Beer Joint’s popularity is demonstrated by the collection of koozies along the wall behind the bar. Though there are koozies for sale inside, these particularly koozies perched above the proceedings belong to locals and regulars who snag their personal koozie upon entry. The beer that fits snugly in those koozies is beyond reasonably priced, nightly happy hours dropping the price bracket down even more on the domestic bottles that dominate the selection. Drinking a sub-$3 Lone Star in a Texas dive bar on a hot day surrounded by neighborhood regulars is a hard experience to beat.
Just inside the front door, a long corridor includes the koozie selection already mentioned as well as dive bar standard trophies, some of them with Bud Light cans as load-bearing elements. Gaming machines are interspersed here as well among some other odds and ends as well as the first of many Christmas light strands inside. This haphazard collection quickly gives way to a cavernous interior space split up into two rooms, the first of them featuring the snaking bar itself. A dividing wall between this first corridor and the main room is home to the proclaimed Asshole Section, which, signage aside, might be the best seat in the house.